To Beard or not to Beard

The competition is fierce… Which beard do you think is superior?

The competition is fierce… Which beard do you think is superior?

Anna Podborny, Crown Writer and Photographer

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Chin up, folks, it’s about to get hairy. The beards of Dr. Pinnau and Mr. Widzisz seem to be an intense topic of gossip around the school. They’ve become a quintessential part of Marian. We’ve seen them short, long, lumberjack-like, and everything in between. So what’s the deal with the beards?

Dr. Pinnau has been sporting his beard for nearly an entire year. And when the school year started, there’s no question that the sight of the teacher came as shock to almost everyone. The beard became a legend. In response to why it has become such an icon at the school, Pinnau says, “It exudes wisdom.” Well, any student who has Pinnau as a teacher will know that he is extremely wise, but now there are answers as to where this wisdom comes from…the beard. Pinnau also expresses his intense interest in beard clips… an odd interest, some might say. “It’s super awesome when it’s clipped,” he states. “I was wearing a dragonfly the other day. It was green.”

Pinnau isn’t alone in his beard endeavors. Mr. Widzisz also became synonymous with the word “lumberjack.” Students in past years were used to seeing Widzisz with a scraggly half-beard, but this year, he took it to new lengths – literally. The decision to grow out the beard was a logical one. “I don’t like shaving,” Widzisz says simply. Unlike Pinnau, Widzisz has absolutely no idea why his beard became such a point of interest, but he says he wasn’t unhappy with the attention.

Unfortunately, Beard Master #2 was not to remain forever.

On March 18, 2019, students watched in shock as Jamie from Mythbusters made his way through the halls of Marian. Who was this look-a-like?

It was Mr. Widzisz – sans beard. Confusion spread like wildfire. What had caused this drastic change? A mid-life crisis? Perhaps a rowdy game of truth or dare? The real answer was much tamer. To Widzisz, this seemed like an easy way out of a tough situation. “I started having to take care of it,” Widzisz says. “What was once easy all of a sudden started requiring work. It became counter-productive.” Pinnau seems to hold some very strong opinions about Mr. Widzisz’s big chop. “Weak,” he states simply when asked about Widzisz’s decision. Unlike Widzisz, he has no plans to cut his beard in the foreseeable future. “I’m hoping by the fall I’ll be able to braid it.” And what does Widzisz have to say about Pinnau’s criticism? Well, it seems there are no hard feelings: “I concede. The good doctor wins.”

Students have some pretty strong opinions about the beards as well. On the subject of Pinnau’s beard, A.J. Leidig (12) states, “I love it. He should have kept it full though.” Perhaps even more intriguing, however, are the numerous comparisons students make between Mr. Widzisz and various celebrities. “I think with his big beard he looks like ZZ Top and with the little beard, he looks like Walter White. I support it,” Amanda Hoople (12) says through laughter. Another common comparison is Jamie Hyneman.

There’s no doubt that the beards will remain a staple of the Marian community. It seems both Pinnau and Widzisz (and the students) have grown to love the friendly rivalry. Let’s hope the beards continue to grow as well. Long live the Beard Masters!

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